Dear Parents Friends
Greetings
I am missing interacting with your children everyday and am hoping that they are doing well. In this time of changing dynamics for our very existence, I have a small concern that I want to share with you all.
Your children are looking upon you for “Hand Holding” to meet this situation. Everything that’s happening around is new, and we need to support each other in every way.
When we had our kids we were responsible for showing them how basic things were done like walking, talking, holding a spoon, and these little ones charmed their ways into our lives falling, fumbling but doing them. Slowly by slowly practicing made them perfect. We were so happy taking care of them and shielding them from any harm.
We certainly have been good providers giving them good education, opportunities to hone up their talents like singing and dancing and arts, engaging them in sports and being supportive of what they want to do always.
You are lucky to have them with you here at home, but some of us have kids who are away. As a concerned parent I just asked my son how he was coping up with no food deliveries etc. and what problems he was facing. He said he was doing ok this time as he was prepared but he had a feeling of helplessness a few years back.
It took me back to an incident when I had to leave him with my ailing father at home as my mother had to be hospitalized suddenly for surgery. We had a cook coming to assist and on one day she had a family emergency and could not reach. My father had a particular food requirement because of his ill health and my son could not order just anything from outside. He knew there were provisions around at home but he could not cook a meal from him. Though he managed to arrange for help and got the needful done, he quoted this incident for him being unprepared to be a caregiver.
He told me that if only I had prepared him for life skills along with other things he would have felt better. Over the years he has learned these skills and is now doing fine.
We are really lucky that we have help from maids, food delivery systems and we depend on them and that’s great, but some basic skills need to be given to our children that we don’t even think about twice. I am asking your help in this domain and am hoping that you would come forward in doing so.
. Sharpening the knife skills CCS.
Chop onions, Cut potatoes, Slice tomatoes.
For any purpose these three ingredients need us to hold a knife in a different manner. Once we master these methods of CCS, any veggie or fruit is just too easy to manage.
.Boil water and make a cup of tea.
We are addicts to our dose of hot beverages, so the exact proportion of what is to be added and how much it needs to be known. They will thank you for it as when someone is unwell a steaming cup of tea, coffee or soup can pep them up in a jiffy.
.Knead the flour and roll the dough.
In times of need for simple food a good soft roti is the only thing you can digest. You will be happy that once they know this basic technique they will amaze you with trying their hand at making stuffed parathas, pizza, namakparas, samosas, momo’s and the list is endless.
.Steam Rice and make Daal in a cooker.
The best invention done in ages is a cooker. It is easy to handle and speeds up the process. They just need to know what ingredients are needed and the spices to be added. Don’t faze them out with tadkas and the fancy ways of enhancing flavor, just the basic method of tossing everything in one go. Two cookers on the gas whistling away is one of the best sounds when the stomach is crying with hunger. This is a survivor meal when you either don’t have time or have to help someone with some quick homemade food.
.On the go Aaloo Tamatar curry and dry jeera aloo (boiled).
As you yourself never go wrong with this quick fix anytime they too will be happy making this comfort food. Do it the simplest way of not heavy masalas, thick gravy but minimum spices, and a simple method. Caregivers need to know this method as when taking care of someone you don’t have much time to be in the kitchen and it is yummy for the patient too, (one who will refuse to eat almost anything).
Our children are still little kids, don’t expect them to know everything. We in our lifetimes have never faced such a lockdown. So don’t be harsh on them that they don’t help around in the house and are just messy. It’s simple they don’t know any other way, someone has always been there to pick behind them and pamper them. Don’t judge them for what they don’t know or have never been asked to do.
They are blessed and so are we to have them. Feel that now we are just preparing them for a good future, to be confident and not dependent on anything or taking everything for granted. Guide them as you helped them as when they were babies. No penalties, only encouragement is what they need.
Tomorrow we may not need them so much to assist us but they may want to help our old parents, their roommates, their friends in need, their siblings, their loved ones. These tasks are simple as we have been doing them for ages now, so once the kids do them even once or twice they will not hesitate or fear doing them if ever a need arises. Please be there for them now, so that they can make you proud always.
Keeping you all and your loved ones in my prayers for good health and strength in this difficult time. Take care.
My simple motto in life, “Be Good, Do Good”.
Shelly Verma